Friday, July 6, 2012

The daring to love - radical & (r)evolutionary

"Whoever you are, wherever you are.. I'm starting to think we're a lot alike. Human beings spinning on blackness. All wanting to be seen, touched, heard, paid attention to... on the days we were together, time would glide. Most of the day I'd see him, and his smile. I'd hear his conversation and his silence... It was my first love, it changed my life" ~FO
 
YES!
 As I look into the abyss that has threatened to swallow my peace & faith & spirit over the last four days ... I would give anything, *anything* to feel that I had one, a beloved, whose presence, whether in speech or silence, could provide a safe haven now as I stand in the fire. What I would give to not feel like I am, once again, traversing these troubled waters alone. And so, the thing that continues to floor me is that in so much of the ins and outs of debates and dialogues, the silence & silencing, the essentialness of that call to love still, STILL, gets questioned. What could be more intrinsically human than the unexpected, startling pull when we are compelled to love... This letter is just as beautiful, its sentiment as piercing and ineffable, when written (in part) as an outpouring of love from one man to another, as if it were penned and posted by my very own hand. How wonderfully, inescapably majestic the daring to love. Radical indeed.
"In rap music, love calls attention to vulnerability that invalidates old ideas about what it means to be a man, both in hip-hop and broader society... But perhaps the greatest legacy of Ocean's letter is that descriptions of his own same-gender romance are woven into a far more intricate tapestry, one that's less about romantic love and more about the power of love to touch every facet of the author's life." M Jeffries

And yet, as Jeffries insightfully notes, what makes this letter of love even more daring, (r)evolutionary if you will, is that it not only calls out the humanity of falling in love, but it acknowledges and insists that the love we share in communion, in our other significant relationships are *equally* essential. It testifies to creating a life guided by "an understanding of love, and the relationships in which we share it, that no longer needs to classify, delimit and categorize the myriad expressions of love of which we're capable," recognizing that all to often "the models we have now, they simply are not enough" ~JJB

And so ... to you who *continue* to share your journey & open up your tender places - at times even in the midst of your own mourning & loss - who prevent me from getting lost in grief & keep me mindful that I don't have a monopoly on pain, once again, I thank you. In moments like these, when my heart continues to crack open, how blessed am I to have a community, if more far than near, to fill those spaces left behind with love so that I can have a hope of healing ... that, that is what they call grace...
 

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